The Second Step

My husband and I have been married for 7 wonderful years. He had two tattoos when I met him, and to be honest they weren’t really an “issue”. We really never talked about them. One is on his shoulder and the other massive one is one his back. So, I guess they were “hidden”. Nothing for me to think about or to worry about. About 3 years ago he mentioned that he wanted to get another one. I was shocked. I too had a tattoo and I associated it with an extremely rebellious time in my life. I’ve even considered having it removed.  And…I certainly did not want another one!  So why should he want one? We are married right? We are one. We should be thinking exactly the same way. Clearly. This is just a faze, it will pass. So…about 6 months later the tattoo question came up again, but this time with a little more seriousness and less sarcasm. I looked at him like he was crazy. We are parents, parents don’t do this sort of thing. We live in the suburbs…hello?! But this time my sweet husband was persistent.

But, once again the conversation lay dormant for awhile. Until, one day he came home and I thought something bad had happened, he had such a serous look in his eyes. He asked me to listen. Uh oh…so I did. His exact words to me were, “I want you to really consider me getting another tattoo.” I saw the look in his eye and realized that he had been thinking about this for a very long time. This was hard for him to bring up with me. He already knew how I felt. I was very quiet. This began a very long conversation. What are you going to get? Where? On the lower arms? Oh my! It’s funny how that affected me. What are people going to think? What is my dad going to think? Wow, this was hard. Did I mention that we live in good ole suburbia America? People don’t have those here. Should we move to the city? The dialogue continued for another 6 months and something happened, I began to really understand why. It’s very simple, he likes them. The more I talked with him about it, the more I really saw that this is how he is. He is not some guy who just thinks it’s cool to have a tat. It’s him, in a way, it’s his personality.

It’s funny how for 7 years I have wanted him to fit my mold of who a husband should be. Having a tattoo will not take away from him, but instead add to him. It will make him more of who he is. I’m excited now about the new tattoos, yes there is an s on the end of that.

Amazing how a heart can change.